Closer, closer to his face he is drawing me, and it's because he has brought me new life. Yes, I am overseas and learning a new culture, and learning new 'way of life' in the physical, but I'm also learning that just as it says in 2 Corinthians that Christ died, so that we may life our life for his name and his glory and no longer for ourselves.

I'm truly learning what it looks like to have a gentle and quiet spirit. To be a supporter, an encourager. I'm learning how to pray and what to pray and how powerful prayer truly is-- I don't always have to have the right words-- it's okay not to. I don't have to live on past experiences or even use them as examples for others because even as it says in 1 john that Christ's testimony is so much more and stronger than our own. I long, as i've said in posts before to know Christ and him crucified and that's it!

Something a friend and mentor told me in a conversation has been sticking in my mind the past week. "People don't relate to 'perfect' people. They relate to broken people." This is something in my mind i've known, but it's nice to put the thoughts into words. Brokenness and desperation are things people can relate to, truth and reality are things we should live with and openly with. Christ knows me behind all my disguises. He knows my fears. He knows my struggles and my worries. He knows what makes me upset and sad and weepy and sorrowful, he knows my pride and my selfishness. He knows ME and he knows my heart.

I'm learning to trust people with my heart and my struggles-- to be open and honest, so that at the end of the day or in the morning Steph or Shan or my confidants can ask "how are your thoughts today?!" "Are you listening to the voice of truth?"

My prayer is that Father would kill the selfishness in me and continue to draw me to him. To show me what it looks like to live in the spirit and abiding in him, to not continually compare myself to others and dwell in my insecurities. To hand my fears and 'failures' over to him.


Many times Father has more faith in me than i have in myself, and I'm learning the reality of that statement.

Today so far has been wonderful and it has only started! I saw "S" a friend that I met last year that has been a continual friend throughout the year through myspace. but i didn't have the chance to talk to her because we were both switching trains, so hopefully we can get in contact!

Today I'm going to have lunch at the E-Special with Lin and i'm excited, not to talk about what Father is doing in my life but to hear about what he's doing in hers. My pr is that he can use the small amount of time to encourage both of us. I adore her and her heart and passion for Father.

I love you all, thanks for your prayers, Father is and has been and is continuing to do HUGE things

<3 me