To my sweet friends who are waiting on God's timing or struggling with wanting something so much but it just not happening -- Please hear me out.
We weren't going to tell you guys. We were going to let you just find out randomly one day that we added a second child to our family- because the fact of the matter is, God has given us a minuscule taste of what infertility feels like for others over the past 10 months.
(And I don't say minuscule lightly. To those who have been battling infertility for far longer, I'm sure ten months sounds like nothing.)
I, Lara, didn't want to post because all the pregnancy posts and updates I've seen this year--where as they make me overjoyed and happy, are sadly tinged with a personal feeling of "oh God, have you forgotten me?" I struggled with letting my hurt steal joy from celebrating with my sweet friends and sisters.
All along this short journey (but it felt oh so long), I feel God pulling me in close and whispering two things- Lara, you dream of legacy for the sake of my name. Watch, be amazed. My version of legacy isn't written by you but will be far beyond your imagination. You won't be disappointed. Look at not what I will do (or what you want me to do) but what I have done and am doing. And also: I haven't forgotten you. Trust me. Seth remained a beacon of hope- reminding me that God had a plan and a future for us.
Through this journey I came to accept that if Watson was our only child, when I dreamt of many, that we were just as blessed with him as we would be with 2 or 5 kids.
As we rejoice for this life forming in my womb of whom we have prayed for and cried for, I so long to say to those struggling far beyond what we have struggled and to those who are just now entering their season of trying for a sweet baby, I know that deep deep seated desire. But I can tell you this- I see you. You aren't overlooked, you aren't forgotten. And more than me seeing you, God sees you. He deems you important enough to bless and he never dismisses your hopes and dreams. I am praying for you today. I am praying for life inside your womb or life inside someone else's that will be placed into your arms and called yours.
So with that, we ask all our friends to join with us in celebrating this new life- We are really excited for this sweet life God has given us. Thankful that he hears us, and that just like I told you, he deems not only our desires but this specific baby important enough to bless and will never dismiss his or her hopes and dreams. Praying for this life inside and praying that he or she is feels blessed beyond measure and loves loves loves Jesus. Sweet baby, we pray your life is always celebrated.
