What is your legacy?

I just woke up from a dream, and I'm not sure why I had it... because it hasn't been a topic I've been thinking about lately. I had a dream i was in K-Stadt working with students from Falls Creek. For some reason the students that week were really worried about numbers and the amount of people who were becoming believers. I was sitting on the u-bahn and the team was talking about it, and Linley and I were trying to stress the point that it isn't about numbers. Normally I don't remember words or what I "say" in dreams, but I said to one girl in particular, "you are so much more than a number to God, he KNOWS you and he KNOWS your name." I then began describing the following: "when I had to get my socialversicherungsausweis (social security card) in Germany, just as in the states I had to grab a number and wait. About 20 minutes later my number was called and it was my turn, but with Christ it's so much more than that. He calls me by NAME. He says 'Lara, come to me.' He knows that I'm weak and weary and he knows my faults and failures. He created me to be human, but he's calling me to go beyond myself and come to him."

1 "This is what the LORD says to his anointed,
to Cyrus, whose right hand I take hold of
to subdue nations before him
and to strip kings of their armor,
to open doors before him
so that gates will not be shut:

2 I will go before you
and will level the mountains;
I will break down gates of bronze
and cut through bars of iron.

3 I will give you the treasures of darkness,
riches stored in secret places,
so that you may know that I am the LORD,
the God of Israel, who summons you by name.

4 For the sake of Jacob my servant,
of Israel my chosen,
I summon you by name
and bestow on you a title of honor,
though you do not acknowledge me.

5 I am the LORD, and there is no other;
apart from me there is no God.
I will strengthen you,
though you have not acknowledged me,

6 so that from the rising of the sun
to the place of its setting
men may know there is none besides me.
I am the LORD, and there is no other.

7 I form the light and create darkness,
I bring prosperity and create disaster;
I, the LORD, do all these things.

8 "You heavens above, rain down righteousness;
let the clouds shower it down.
Let the earth open wide,
let salvation spring up,
let righteousness grow with it;
I, the LORD, have created it.

9 "Woe to him who quarrels with his Maker,
to him who is but a potsherd among the potsherds on the ground.
Does the clay say to the potter,
'What are you making?'
Does your work say,
'He has no hands'?

10 Woe to him who says to his father,
'What have you begotten?'
or to his mother,
'What have you brought to birth?'

11 "This is what the LORD says—
the Holy One of Israel, and its Maker:
Concerning things to come,
do you question me about my children,
or give me orders about the work of my hands?

12 It is I who made the earth
and created mankind upon it.
My own hands stretched out the heavens;
I marshaled their starry hosts.

13 I will raise up Cyrus in my righteousness:
I will make all his ways straight.
He will rebuild my city
and set my exiles free,
but not for a price or reward,
says the LORD Almighty."

14 This is what the LORD says:
"The products of Egypt and the merchandise of Cush,
and those tall Sabeans—
they will come over to you
and will be yours;
they will trudge behind you,
coming over to you in chains.
They will bow down before you
and plead with you, saying,
'Surely God is with you, and there is no other;
there is no other god.' "

15 Truly you are a God who hides himself,
O God and Savior of Israel.

16 All the makers of idols will be put to shame and disgraced;
they will go off into disgrace together.

17 But Israel will be saved by the LORD
with an everlasting salvation;
you will never be put to shame or disgraced,
to ages everlasting.

18 For this is what the LORD says—
he who created the heavens,
he is God;
he who fashioned and made the earth,
he founded it;
he did not create it to be empty,
but formed it to be inhabited—
he says:
"I am the LORD,
and there is no other.

19 I have not spoken in secret,
from somewhere in a land of darkness;
I have not said to Jacob's descendants,
'Seek me in vain.'
I, the LORD, speak the truth;
I declare what is right.

20 "Gather together and come;
assemble, you fugitives from the nations.
Ignorant are those who carry about idols of wood,
who pray to gods that cannot save.

21 Declare what is to be, present it—
let them take counsel together.
Who foretold this long ago,
who declared it from the distant past?
Was it not I, the LORD ?
And there is no God apart from me,
a righteous God and a Savior;
there is none but me.

22 "Turn to me and be saved,
all you ends of the earth;
for I am God, and there is no other.

23 By myself I have sworn,
my mouth has uttered in all integrity
a word that will not be revoked:
Before me every knee will bow;
by me every tongue will swear.

24 They will say of me, 'In the LORD alone
are righteousness and strength.' "
All who have raged against him
will come to him and be put to shame.

25 But in the LORD all the descendants of Israel
will be found righteous and will exult.

Lately, I have been thinking about 'art.' All aspects of it, but the question in my mind is, "is it better to be the artist, or the spectator?!" Since a class in my reading comprehension class, I posed this question to myself. I'm not even sure why I have been thinking about this so much, or if it even matters. But let's think: Is it better to be the ballerina or the violinist or the singer, or is it better to sit in the audience and appreciate the works? And then it's a question of intent. What is my intent as the performer? Am I performing for self, or for the audience or for some higher power? i.e. God. What is my intent as the spectator? To be cultured and appreciate 'the arts' as the world tells me I should? To lose myself in thoughts of life and wants while watching? Entertainment?

I'll end this post with the Preface of The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, it seems appropriate, and the words keep running through my mind.

The artist is the creator of beautiful things.

To reveal art and conceal the artist is art's aim.

The critic is he who can translate into another manner or a new material his impression of beautiful things.

The highest as the lowest form of criticism is a mode of autobiography. Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming.

This is a fault.

Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope.

They are the elect to whom beautiful things mean only beauty.

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written.

That is all.

The nineteenth century dislike of realism is the rage of Caliban seeing his own face in a glass.

The nineteenth century dislike of romanticism is the rage of Caliban not seeing his own face in a glass.

The moral life of man forms part of the subject-matter of the artist, but the morality of art consists in the perfect use of an imperfect medium. No artist desires to prove anything. Even things that are true can be proved.

No artist has ethical sympathies.

An ethical sympathy in an artist is an unpardonable mannerism of style. No artist is ever morbid. The artist can express everything.

Thought and language are to the artist instruments of an art.

Vice and virtue are to the artist materials for an art.

From the point of view of form, the type of all the arts is the art of the musician.

From the point of view of feeling, the actor's craft is the type.

All art is at once surface and symbol.

Those who go beneath the surface do so at their peril.

Those who read the symbol do so at their peril.

It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.

Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the work is new, complex, and vital.

When critics disagree, the artist is in accord with himself.

We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless thing is that one admires it intensely.

All art is quite useless.

OSCAR WILDE

Two days ago I was talking to J about what Christianity is like in his country. He said something to me about how my goal isn't to convert others to Christianity. I said, "no it's not, because I cannot make that decision for other people. I do want them to hear and know what I believe is truth, and atleast have the opportunity to decide."

The conversation keeps running through my mind. Perhaps it affected me more than him, but continue to lift J and others up when/if you think about it.


love you all

Lara





She lifts her head from the spring of water and feels refreshment sweep through her body. This feels like life, but is it? Stepping from the water and grabbing a towel near the bank and began drying away the cool water as she gazed out the cave, peering into the sunset. It had been a long time since she had been here. As she got older, the busy-ness of life seemed to catch hold of her and she rarely found time to get away. With a sigh, she picked up her belongings and began finding her way down the hill. About half way down she caught a glimpse of birds flying through the sky. Their formation drawing her to lay down on the hill she once called her own. She laid among the dozens of flowers and it wasn't long until she found herself in tears, crying herself to sleep.

today after talking on skype and while writing on a friend's wall I realized that I am tired of this. I'm tired of feeling the hunger pains and doing nothing for the hunger. My body is realizing that there is something so much more, that it wants more of Christ. None of this half-passioned faith. I'm tired of sitting inside a church, I'm ready to meet people where they are, outside of the church... Ministry happens while we are living life. I re-read something I wrote in 2005...

There becomes a point where there is a difference between “doing” Christian things and constantly placing Christ in all that we do. Every day is filled with divine opportunities and divine appointments. If we ask Christ to let us see things the way He sees things, and hear things the way He does- He will answer that prayer and we will become susceptible to the workings around us. We must be intentional in our relationships no matter where we are.

It's time for change.


p.s. i love bionade. it is yummy. my favorite is the elder berries (holunder) flavor. :-)

For the past 7 months, I have been praying that Father (being Christ) would show me how to love others the way he loves the church. Matt Chandler had said something in a sermon before I left for Germany this summer- - he said his prayer is that his daughter will meet a man who loves her the way Christ loves the church... and even though I long for that in a man as well, I want to seek to love others in this way as well-- because, we are afterall called to do this as believers.

obviously the whole bible is full of examples of how Christ loves the church-- every word is dripping with his love, sometimes beautiful, sometimes beautiful in the gore and brutality that Christianity sometimes is. Life is full of lessons that teach His love as well-- and daily I am challenged to look at things with His eyes and not my own. However, tonight as I sat reading the words of Psalm 45, I found myself overwhelmed in tears. This is how Father, the author and finisher of our faith loves me? This is how I am called to love?! Me?! I am undeserving. Me?! I am incapable... I sat there, in the midst of many, yet all seemed to disappear. As I read and re-read the words, my heart literally pounded within me, and never before have a felt something so intense. My thoughts being ones of my prayer of asking Christ to show me how to love the way he loves, the answer being poured out right in front of me. My heart is eager to love. I want to convey to people on every level my love for them. I want my family, my boyfriend, my friends to know and feel my love I have for them. I want the source of my love to be Christ... and honestly, I read these words of this Psalm, and i have NO clue how I will be capable, and I have no idea how I will completely die to my fleshly self... but I seek to find out.

I **beg** you to read the pslam below, to dwell on the words and meditate on it. Many times i see that people post bible verses/psalms and i just glance at it and think "oh that's cool..." but if you gain anything or remember anything from this post, let it be this Psalm... Father's words are so much more than my own.

Psalm 45

A Royal Wedding Song

For the choir director: according to "The Lilies." A Maskil of the sons of Korah. A love song.

My heart is moved by a noble theme
as I recite my verses to the king;
my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.

You are the most handsome of men;
grace flows from your lips.
Therefore God has blessed you forever.

Mighty warrior, strap your sword at your side.
In your majesty and splendor —
in your splendor ride triumphantly
in the cause of truth, humility, and justice.
May your right hand show your awe-inspiring deeds.

Your arrows pierce the hearts of the king's enemies;
the peoples fall under you.
Your throne, God, is forever and ever;
the scepter of Your kingdom is a scepter of justice.
You love righteousness and hate wickedness;
therefore God, your God, has anointed you,
more than your companions, with the oil of joy.

Myrrh, aloes, and cassia [perfume] all your garments;
from ivory palaces harps bring you joy.
Kings' daughters are among your honored women;
the queen, adorned with gold from Ophir,
stands at your right hand.

Listen, daughter, pay attention and consider:
forget your people and your father's house,
and the king will desire your beauty.
Bow down to him, for he is your lord.
The daughter of Tyre, the wealthy people,
will seek your favor with gifts.

In [her chamber], the royal daughter is all glorious,
her clothing embroidered with gold.
In colorful garments she is led to the king;
after her, the virgins, her companions, are brought to you.
They are led in with gladness and rejoicing;
they enter the king's palace.

Your sons will succeed your ancestors;
you will make them princes throughout the land.
I will cause your name to be remembered for all generations;
therefore the peoples will praise you forever and ever.

The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes.

The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever.
The ordinances of the LORD are sure and altogether righteous.

Colossians 3

He Is Your Life

1-2 So if you're serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don't shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that's where the action is. See things from his perspective.

3-4Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you'll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.

5-8And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death: sexual promiscuity, impurity, lust, doing whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it, and grabbing whatever attracts your fancy. That's a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God. It's because of this kind of thing that God is about to explode in anger. It wasn't long ago that you were doing all that stuff and not knowing any better. But you know better now, so make sure it's all gone for good: bad temper, irritability, meanness, profanity, dirty talk.

9-11Don't lie to one another. You're done with that old life. It's like a filthy set of ill-fitting clothes you've stripped off and put in the fire. Now you're dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete. Words like Jewish and non-Jewish, religious and irreligious, insider and outsider, uncivilized and uncouth, slave and free, mean nothing. From now on everyone is defined by Christ, everyone is included in Christ.

12-14So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It's your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

15-17Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.

Lift up your eyes, the harvest is here

Oh, It’s Christmas time in Hannover, and it’s so evident of that. The week of thanksgiving, the city began to build and set up the Christmas markets… and they truly are extravagant. Hannover builds a huge huge traditional german windmill thing every year, and there are funnel cakes (schmalzkuchen) and warm drinks and laughter and fun and chestnuts roasting on open fires!!, and it’s so exciting.

November was quite an interesting month… and went by so terribly fast but so terribly slow at the same time. I experienced a bout of sickness that involved throwing up and running a temperature and it only heightened the homesickness and culture shock I was experiencing! Never before have I felt so down and alone and, I truly hope those moments don’t become often here. I am learning to seek Christ in each day… and learn from Him… to take each day as a gift and to ask Him to show me how to live it. Christ spoke to me so much through those moments of tears and hurt. I will recall this month so often and I don’t think I will ever forget the days of being on my knees in tears crying out to God. Through tears, I learned to bow on my knees and worship Christ. I’m not sure I can say I have ever truly done that. “God you are God, even when I can’t feel you, even when I don’t see the hope for the future, I know you are here. I know you are near, and I know you are God.”

It has been amazing to see how Father has delivered me out of my loneliness. Last weekend I left early Friday morning and traveled 2 hours by train to Hamburg and got there around 10:00 am. I met S and S at the train station and the day was full of going to shops and buying things for Thanksgiving Dinner that night. I spent the afternoon and first part of the evening cleaning and cooking and feeling like I was in family. “It feels so good to have our little sister here.” Those words filled me with a joy I hadn’t felt in so long. I spent the whole weekend there leaving later on Monday night, and it was so nice to feel like I had spent the weekend with family. One day I spent with S and C, and S poured truth and God’s promises into my life. She reminded me that I am a new creation and experiences will be so totally different for me than any one else—as is true for everyone. That Christ placed his power IN us, and that he is molding me and more. She told me things I know, but the way she said them were new, and I love her for caring about me so much in ways that I don’t really deserve.

Another amazing aspect of going to Hamburg was how encouraged I was to lift up my eyes and see what Father is doing among the generation of believers there, and among the many other communities there as well. I was filled with a passion to come back and live my life in Hannover in expectancy and to truly allow Christ to mold me to follow him and see his harvest the way he sees it and to not look at things with my eyes.

I am meeting so many amazing people, and learning more of the German culture and views than I ever have before. I won’t mention certain situations or people, but simply ask for your prayer.

Well, it is December 1, the first day of the Advent. I will eat my first chocolate piece but as advent comes I have been challenged to pray with expectency for revival… for Hannover. For the believers, for others to come to face. Emmanuel means ‘God with us,” so instead of getting distracted by celebrating Jesus this December, I don’t want to neglect spending time with him! Today Naomi arrives, and in a couple of hours I will go to get her at the airport! It’s neat to see how Christ is bringing me out of my loneliness in many ways. I think this month of her being here, and Daniel Wilson and my parents coming to spend time for the holidays as well will be a blessing. I know I am worrying already about January because it will be a busy month in which friends and family have departed, the weather is colder than usual, the hours of daylight equal about 3 hours a day, and my exams and the pressure of passing will be double time as the semester comes to an end. If you long to pray for me pray for Revival, pray for me to have a calm heart- to take one day at a time and to not dwell on the loneliness that may come in January and February.

Another prayer request is that I have been offered a maybe scholarship. If I get this, it would help me and my family and money situations SO much, as I am sure many of you can relate. I know many of you have my blog site, but if you don’t and would like it—let me know-- I also challenge you to check out trentandlindsey.blogspot.com as well.

Thank you so much,
Lara