Oh goodness! It has almost been 2 whole months since I updated! I mean, I know I have a huge following so I'm sorry to keep everyone on the edge of their seats ;-). (ha. ha.)

A lot has happened in these two months. From traveling to Texas (again) to having a mobile baby who can crawl, pull up on things, eat well and has two teeth. Seth has started working at home for his very own company building web sites. He's met some pretty cool people already and is making some pretty awesome websites. It's been a weird adjustment and transition but I'm proud of Seth and excited for what God has for us!! :-)

Watson has recently "found his voice." When I say "found his voice," I mean that he loves to share his opinion lately!! I love it, I'm glad! But his opinion is usually that of "no, I will not sit in this car seat and will arch my back so it's extremely difficult for you to buckle me in." or "excuse me. I was chewing on those car keys, please give them back to me or I will FUHREAK OUT." It's extremely cute, but I'm also seeing some roots of what could become discipline problems! (What?! Watson isn't perfect?! I know! I'm surprised too ;-) #justkidding).

I really feel like God is calling me to start training myself in what I will and will not allow. But what does that look like and how do I do that when my child is only 7.5 months old? It's not time to start discipling him yet, it wouldn't work and I'm not sure how I would even go about doing that. But it is time to train myself. So, when Watson is not wanting his diaper changed and would rather roll over and crawl away with half a diaper on, I gently grab him and I say "okay bubs, (apparently my new nick name for him), we have to get your diaper changed and THEN we can crawl around." Of course, this isn't anything new. [Side note:Pretty sure I've said those things while babysitting my whole life... but being a momma is way different than being a babysitter! The level of tiredness is simply crazy. I could never have imagined it. It's my new normal, and not horrible -but I laugh at all the times I thought I was tired before having a baby/being pregnant.It would be WAY easier to just let him crawl away and not deal with him freaking out... *sigh*] So I as a mom, have a choice. Do I let him crawl away with half a diaper on and stealthily follow him and get the rest of his diaper on or do I train myself (and him) to not allow that and get the diaper on him the correct way? This is such a small issue that can build some deep seated roots of not "demanding (in a healthy way)" respect from my child - in myself.

Another example and then off to another subject: The other day we went for a walk. Watson doesn't particularly like being constrained i.e. car seats and strollers are not his ideal sitting situation. We got to the park and I put Watson in his stroller and he immediately starts screaming. I stopped what I was doing, looked into his eyes and said "Hey. Hey baby. You are okay. We're going to go for a walk and I want you to just sit in the stroller and choose to enjoy yourself and the nice weather!" Could Watson understand me? I mean. he's a genius, so maybe, but probably not. Guys. He cried practically the whole time. It wasn't a "I'm alone, please help me." It wasn't an "I'm hungry. please feed me." It wasn't "Hey I'm super tired, please hold me." It was "I don't want to be in this stroller. I want my way, I want it now." It was super obvious, guys. Trust me. I had a choice as a mom. 1. Take him out of the stroller. Walk awkwardly while holding baby and pushing stroller. 2. Stick to my guns as a momma, "demand" respect and not allow myself to give into his "sweet" cries. I made the second choice. It was hard.... mostly because I felt like people would judge me for walking with a baby who is crying (i.e. acting like a baby). 3/4s into our walk he finally figured it out and I think maybe started to enjoy himself. Today, when we got to the zoo, we had the same "conversation" and he did pretty great. Probably just a different day, probably had nothing to do with our last experience... but I was happy. Sometimes I think parenting isn't just training your children, but also training yourself.

New subject: I've been pretty down on myself because I fall into this wonderful sin called "comparison." Seth and I don't have the finances for me to do some things that I would like to - like stroller strides (exercising with baby in stroller), swim classes, fun stuff for babies that cost money, etc. I don't mention that to get pity, but to confess that I've been envious of friends and others who can afford to do that. This past week or so, God has been faithful to show me as a momma that Watson has plenty of opportunity to spend time with children his age, learn new skills, and I have friends here in Seattle that I don't need to meet at something I have to pay to go to. Those things are wonderful things and I still wish I could participate in some of them, but it doesn't measure my worth as a mom, and that's the take away here. It doesn't mean I won't have friends because I don't have people to meet with every week... the fact is, I do have friends, and so does Watson and God has blessed us beyond measure. I truly feel like God has called me to be thankful for what we have as well as thankful for what my friends have.

Thanks for reading my ramblings <3 You guys rock.

I can't wait to see how God grows, loves, transforms and leads this sweet child.