Marriage. It ain't easy. But, it's edifying. It draws us nearer to Christ. Through it, I've learned more about the character of Father. I'm very much in love with my husband. Absolutely 100% in love with him. But, I sometimes fail to show this and show it well.

Before I met Seth, a previous guy during his break up speech told me that I needed a man, not a coward like himself (his words, not mine). I needed someone strong and I needed someone who could protect me and lead me well. I was so mad and confused when I heard those words from this one guy that I didn't really comprehend this guy's heart behind those words - and honestly, I didn't really want to. But later, as my emotions calmed down and I was able to think clearly, that became my prayer. For a man who could lead me Biblically. For a man who would love me like Jesus loves the church.

Seth isn't perfect. He loves me well when I don't love him well. When I had/have panic attacks, he holds me until I calm down. When I am in the deepest pit, sure he gets frustrated, but I know that most of that frustration stems from having a wife who is hurting. He's never leaving me. I know and understand this reality and I am thankful for it.

When I was younger I had lies spoken into my heart. I would never make a man happy. I would never have a good relationship with my husband. Because of these lies, I have struggled to love Seth well and be the wife God calls me to be.

Seth isn't the man that matches up to my list of "must haves" from high school... and that's because God knows my needs and my heart better than I do. I never thought I'd marry a man 18 inches taller than me. I never thought that one of my biggest struggles in my marriage would be that I can't really hug my husband "whenever I want" because of our height difference. I never thought I'd marry a man who will do anything to protect me and guard me and lead our family in the way Father would have us go.

We are two sinners, who mess up a LOT but standing on the foundation that is Christ, who, loves us, forgives us, and teaches us more and more about himself. Thankful for my marriage. Thankful for Seth. Thankful for Jesus. Thankful for Gospel Truth.